birth controll

Shut the fuck up you ocean of cum

mom: ok u wait in line i forgot to get the milk
me: ok
me: 
me: 
me: 
me: mom where are you please
me: mom please the line is moving fast
me: mom i cant breathe where r u it's almost my turn
employee: next
me: 
employee: 
me: faints

oatmealraisinasians:

going into hot topic and being judged by the scene girls is one of my favorite activities

dudesranch:

remember when i told you guys about that girl who made a fake facebook boyfriend and has him comment on her stuff and make status updates about her

five months later they’re still going strong

beyoncebeytwice:

how funny would it be to meet an atheist named christian

commanderinqueef:

help I’ve fallen and am perfectly capable of getting up but refuse to

unityinfinity:

Credits- Tranny-Worsnop